This is just one of those nights where I'm feeling my inner emo and its full array of emo feelings, including but not limited to fear, doubts, anger, regrets, guilt, and all that kind of good stuff. It's like, for the past few months I've been enjoying a most wonderful stay at a mansion filled with good food and... good food, but today I looked down despite of my resolution to not to, and saw the foundation of all the wonderfulness being a rock that can tumble down the cliff at any time.

wow, that was pretty... emo. I'm proud of myself

It's not caused by a single thing, rather a complexity of many issues, some of which I thought I left behind when I finally found a clear goal. I think I'm starting to understand why some people drink as much as they do.

Anyhow, just blowing off some steam... by tomorrow morning everything will be all ok again. Come to think of it, maybe I just need more sleep.